Longstalk family

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The Evolution of the World and Beginning of a Tribe...(because it is a tribe, not a family, there can be sloppy make-outs between Longstalks)

Before there was land or sea, before the moons and stars, before light and dark, before there was anything, there was him. He was the something in the nothing, it was his will that there was a beginning, and it is him that allows the continuing. He is the original blacksmith, and all that you see comes from his forge.

In the beginning, there was only darkness, the spark of an idea became the sun and it was center, cutting through the black and shining upon a universe of nothing. Into the nothingness, planets were born and stars were hung. Elanthia emerged as the favored world. The sea was filled and the mountains raised, moons were set to orbit, and gods emerged to bring favor and famine to the land. Creatures, great and small populated the lands, and elven races were set amongst them, collecting their treasures. Sparkling gems and shiny coins brought prosperity to those skilled enough to obtain them, and with those skills came power.

As the world turned, the creator began to covet the adventures that enriched the lives of his creations. He sent forth the World Dragon to test the mettle of the Immortals, and when they were able to contain it within the center of his favored world, he felt that they were finally worthy of a touch of true greatness.

Vivid dreams led Tsun and Zetch to the foot of the World Dragon where they found an enormous pink sapphire, they instinctively knew that they were to take it home to care for it. However, the further they got from the heat of the sleeping dragon, the gem began to dull. They quickly learned that when they put the precious stone close to the hearth, the more brilliant it became. As time passed, they struggled keeping the fire burning hot enough to maintain the stone. Finally, they placed it in the heart of the forge, and stoked the fire into a raging inferno.

As the fire burned, the gem began to glow, brighter and brighter, waves of searing heat rolling from the forge. The earth began to tremble and crack, the rarest of ores flowing from ground like rolling waves of molten lava and crashing against the gem, creating layer upon layer of impenetrable armor, obscuring the light from the precious stone. The shaking ceased and the flow of metal retreated back to the earth, sealing the fissures from whence it sprang. The flames in the forge surged bright as the sun before extinguishing, leaving the coals cool to the touch.

Tsun and Zetch were in awe, they had stood in the middle of the flow of molten metal but found not even a trace of the ore on their boots. The heat from the fire surrounded them, but they were left unscathed. Unsure how to process all that they had seen, they were left speechless, staring at the egg shaped ball of rare metals that now surrounded the sapphire.

Just as they began to find their voices, the sound of metal pounding against metal silenced them. From quick taps to heavy blows, the egg began to rock. A hairline crack started at the base and ran up to the top, a hint of sparkling pink flashing in the defect.




The noise grew louder as the crack widened, until finally the egg split in two, revealing a giant Kaldarian boy, wearing gem encrusted armor and wielding a mighty forging hammer! He adjusted his armor and smiled at the couple, as they stood staring in disbelief. A boy of few words, he simply climbed out of the forge and set off to his new family’s kitchen in search of a meal of protein and good carbohydrates, perhaps a lovely salad, leaving them to process all that happened for themselves.

The child grew quickly, he was strong and fast, with a penchant for pink that often confused the parents he adopted. He was called Squanto, and he laughed easily, hunted naturally, and mastered the forge effortlessly. Truly a piece of the ultimate power in the universe, set down upon Elanthia.

He learned about the power of shiny dokoras, more valuable than piddly lirums and kronars, small and round, they made fun clinking noises when jangled in pockets. But mostly, they proved useful when buying more pink things. Not one to pilfer, he honed his skills and earned the shiny platinums in combat and in the forge. He worked with only the best metals, and created far superior weapons for those who proved worthy to wield them.

As time passed, he realized that as much as his parents adored him, they were busy people and he was pretty self sufficient, and he got kind of lonely. He needed time to enjoy his wealth, and perhaps, a tribe of worthy individuals that could watch him roll around on his pile of dokoras like a large pink dragon. He decided that he would take on disciples who would grow long of stalk and wield superior blades, sharp and heavy, and not to made by alloys of materials greater than four. He attracted a motley crew of adventurers, at first only accepting Kaldarian barbarians like himself, turning away the other like an old woman returns fruit at the market. He grew his tribe, slowly and methodically, bestowing upon them the name “Longstalk”, unafraid to banish those who did not prove themselves to be worthy.

Eventually, Squanto realized that, despite their inferior mettle, there was something to be said for people of other races. He allowed a drunken human mage, who wielded weapons of the correct alloys, into the fold. Zaxor Longstalk, a reluctant hero, coveter of imperial baubles, all around stand up guy, despite his tendency to be rather pickled.

The great creator knew, that this piece of himself on Elanthia would change the landscape of the lands forever, providing superior weapons, collecting all of the witch balls, and building an empire in his own forge. Squanto and his Longstalk Tribe would spend their time training, creating, and gathering all the wealth the land had to offer, turning out greatness that could never be matched. Each day would be a triumph, except one day a week, when the entire universe would shift focus and Squanto would rise above Elanthia, in all of his pink glory. Time would stop,and he would grace the masses with, what could only be described as, awesomeness incarnate! This day, shall be known as Chest Day, and it is good.


Inspired by Zaxor’s person and brought to you by Synamon’s, this is the truest story to ever be told. The preceding was also approved by the wonderful mind behind all that is Squanto, who said, “Zaxor is a delicious stalk,” as well as something about a guffaw. <3